Small but I need to know I'm not losing it. The place on my block ripped out the quarter slots on all washers, installed one of those reloadable card readers, then taped a handwritten sign above it that says 'please use app for best results.' The kiosk works about half the time, the app makes you pre-load way more than one wash, and the dryers still only take quarters. So I'm showing up with a dead card, a paper card, and a fistful of quarters like I'm doing laundry in three different decades. Is this happening all over or did my laundromat guy just invent a new circle of laundry hell?

Oh I know exactly the species of sign you mean. My building has 'app-enabled' washers now too, but the only thing the app enables is me standing in the basement smashing refresh while the machine blinks OFFLINE. And the card machine only takes cash, so you still need exact-ish bills. I honestly just walk two extra blocks to the spot that never changed. The quarter machine there never eats a coin and the guy sells detergent for a decent price. Sometimes low tech is the only tech.

YES! This drives me completely bananas!! The laundry card companies push the app because they make more money on unused balances and 'convenience' fees! The card kiosk at the place on 74th and the app are BOTH run by the same vendor, but they sync maybe once a week. I started keeping a spare card loaded because the machine goes down every Sunday. Have you tried asking the attendant for an override swipe? Mine will do it if you buy supplies, but only if you catch him before 3 pm. Also, do NOT delete the app — your balance is tied to the phone install, not your account, and customer service is a black hole.

Ugh, the override swipe. My old attendant used to just pop the machine with a screwdriver and start it for free when the card reader glitched, but the new guy won't even look up from his phone. I gave up on the app after it logged me out and tried to make me re-add a card. Now I only dry there because the dryers are strong and still take quarters. Washing goes in a laundry bag to my friend's place in the Slope. Not sure if that's a life hack or just avoiding a very specific broken machine.

Opposite problem on my corner: everything is app-only, including the dryers, but the timers shut off ten minutes before the place actually closes. So you pay for a full dry, then the machine locks you out while your clothes sit wet. There's no override because there's no attendant after 8. I've started doing laundry Tuesday mornings just to have a human around. The future is dumb.

@DykerLights I tried the override once and the guy looked at me like I asked to borrow his kidney. He pointed at the app help line and walked into the back. The app help line is a recorded message telling you to try the kiosk. Real closed loop of despair. @BatteryPark_B maybe the two-block walk is the move, I just hate dragging a full duffel through bike lanes with a coffee in the other hand.

@sunsetspark oh I fully do the cursed one-hand duffel-coffee maneuver. The trick is to clip the detergent to the bag with a carabiner and use a travel mug with a lid that actually seals. But yeah, once you find a spot where the machines just take coins and don't pretend to be smart, you put up with the walk. Also, card readers in basements are the most humid-proof? No they are not. Mine constantly errors out when someone's dryer is steaming the whole room. Coin chutes don't care about humidity.

@BatteryPark_B YES, the humidity thing! The card reader at my place is mounted right next to the dryers, so the screen fogs up and you can't type your PIN. A guy literally has a squeegee hanging from it now. I asked the attendant if they could move it six feet to the left and he said the vendor has to do it. The vendor said it's the landlord's outlet placement. Nobody can do anything!!! Have you tried pressing your thumb on the screen for ten seconds to calibrate it? Works maybe 40% of the time.

@DykerLights the squeegee on a string is actually a beautiful image. Sad but beautiful. My old building had a change machine that only accepted bills with no corners missing. Half the quarters in the register were Canadian. You could only buy rolls on the first of the month from the super. I'm starting to think all laundry payment systems are just a long-running prank.

I've started treating laundry quarters like an emergency kit. I keep a little zip pouch with two rolls, a card, and a printed screenshot of the app balance because the reader sometimes needs the barcode just to turn on. It's ridiculous, but the one good thing about this city is there's always another laundromat within ten blocks. @sunsetspark maybe we just make a support group. First rule: bring your own detergent, never trust the dispenser on the machine.